One day there were three surgeons who were arguing loudly over who was the best surgeon.
"Oh yeah," the first one yells. "One day there was this guy who came in with all his fingers cut off, I sewed them back onto his hand, and he's playing piano for the queen of England!"
"Oh, that's nothing," shouts the second one. "One day this guy came in with his arms and legs cut off, I sewed back onto his body, and now he's on the Olympic track and swimming teams!"
"Oh, that isn't jack compared to what I'VE done," bellows the third one. "One day there was this guy who was riding a horse, on cocaine, got hit by a subway train, and all that was left was the guy's body and the horse's ass, I sewed them together, and now he's the President of The United States!"