An office manager had money problems & had to fire an employee, either Jack or Jill.
He thought he'd fire the employee who came late to work the next morning. Well, both employees came to work very early.
Then the manager thought he would catch the first one who took a coffee break. Unfortunately, neither employee took a coffee break.
Then the manager decided to see who took the longest lunch break - strangely, neither Jack nor Jill took a lunch break that day, they both ate at their desk.
Then the manager thought he'd wait & see who would leave work the earliest, and both employees stayed until after closing. Jill finally went to the coat rack so the manager thought he would simply be honest and ask her advice.
He went up to her and said, "Jill, I have a terrible problem. I don't know whether to lay you or Jack off." Jill said, "Well, you'd better jack off - I'm late for my bus."