The Horny Rooster

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  • 1867 Voters
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  • 3¬†years, 6¬†months ago

A farmer's last rooster dies leaving his 200 hens unable to produce chicks. He logs onto roosters.com, finds a highly-touted and high-priced specimen, clicks "order" and the next day, FedEx delivers a rather ordinary looking rooster named Randy.
Before releasing Randy to the chicken coop, the farmer tells him, "You were one danged expensive rooster and I've got a couple hundred chickens here for you to service, so take your time and do a good job."
Randy acts as if he understands, but as soon as he is released he attacks the hens with a vengeance, working his way through the entire flock, not just once, but three times without pause!
The farmer can't believe his eyes. Then Randy runs out of the hen house, sees a flock of geese down by the lake and services all the geese. The farmer is distraught, worrying that his expensive rooster won't make it through the night.
Sure enough, the next morning when the farmer wakes, he sees Randy lying dead, buzzards circling overhead. As the farmer bends over to retrieve his costly loss, he shakes his head and says, "Damn it, Randy! Didn't I tell you to pace yourself?"
Randy opens one eye, looks at the circling buzzards and says, "Shhh. They're getting closer."